'I'm not being funny but…'

avt_emiliabethj_large2

Ahhh, the dreaded phrase… don’t you almost flinch when you hear it?  And it’s nerve-wracking because there’s no way to tell what’s coming.  They could be about to tell you that you have something in your teeth, or that they think you should ‘go back where you came from’.

I’ve actually consciously developed a ‘neutral face’ that I attempt to maintain when I hear this.  Here’s some samples of what I’ve heard so far (although with the thoughts that ran through my mind afterwards).

I’m not being funny, but, :

‘Portion sizes are HUGE in America… is that why everyone is so fat?’ – No, it’s all MY fault… I encourage my people to be sloth-like and eat fried food…

‘When I see Americans walking around in York, they really annoy me’ – Yeah well, now when I see YOU in York, you’ll really annoy me, too…

‘There’s no good cheese in America’ – I have two words for you, bucko… MONTEREY JACK

‘Americans act like they run the world.’ – Excuse me, but, for now at least, WE DO…

‘How can you eat peanut butter and jelly sandwiches??  BLEUGH!!’ – I think this is because they think ‘jelly’ is ‘jello’… classic!

‘I can’t believe you can buy guns at Walmart’ – Yup, gallon of milk, loaf of bread, 9mm automatic firearm, Captain Crunch.  Just your average trip to the grocery store!

‘American’s can’t dress – OK OK… you kinda got me there…

I’m sure more will come to me at some point… cos someone’s gonna say it right to my face…

I'm not from around here… and I'm not alone

yankeebean

I

am

not

from

Yorkshire…

I’m not even English.

‘Divided by a common language’, ‘you’re a Yank’, ‘you’re not from around here, are you?’, ‘don’t you mean “bah-zil”, not “bay-zil”‘.  If it’s a cliche and it has to do with being an American living in England, I’ve heard it… a MILLION times…

This is just one of the things that is a part of life when you’re American, female, and living in the North of England… and it’s just one of the many reasons that me and my American-and-living-in-Yorkshire friends wanted to start this blog.

I can’t take credit for the idea, but I’m looking forward to it, that’s for sure!  An anonymous, totally honest blog about American women that live in Yorkshire…

It’s late now so there’s no time for anecdotes, but this is the beginning of a beautiful relationship…