Why getting fat(ter) in England and Sir Mix-A-lot can go hand in hand.

Posted on May 15, 2010 by peacefulyorkshire

peacefulyorkshire

There once was an American girl named Ms. Peaceful, aged twenty, who hadn’t yet moved to Britain. She enjoyed sweaty daily Bikram yoga sessions and MorningStar Soya burgers. She did 10 Mile bike rides in the sunshine while wearing Lycra. Tanned and toned was she. (Gawd, she even tried all those odd do- it -yourself chair exercises in Self Magazine).

Fast-forward 9 years and meet a new Ms. Peaceful Yorkshire (me): A bulge that I swear looks like I must be in the early stage of pregnancy. Oh, and those fancy Victoria’s Secret undies originally that came in my suitcase from the USA now just don’t cover my Latina bum the same way. This is good viewing for Mr. Chill, my English man, but really folks, a place in Wedgie-Ville is not the best place to be when you are trying to negotiate your salary. I dread to think how many more rolls I would accumulate if I didn’t walk to work on a daily basis. Am I not talkin’ bout the sausage ones!

The Verdict? I am slowly getting fat in England.

It’s the yummy food like Sainsbury’s olives and Cadbury’s chocolate. I am weak around buttery crumpets, bacon sarnies, the cream teas I have with my American Sistahs at Betty’s in York. The cold weather indoor lifestyle I have (what you want me to run in this mizzle?) does not lend myself to be motivated to frolic outside.  Erm, ok.. it’s not England’s fault.

And, while walking home today I decided to take note of some fellow Yorkshire-ites and saw lots of other teacake lovers. Muffin tops rollin’ over jeans, big breasts spillin’ and straining in white work shirts. Ruddy double-chins. Men and women in trouser suits that need to be taken out. (And some British people think Americans are the only fatties on the block?)

Of course it bothers me. I would be such a liar if I said it doesn’t! Unlike my former American self I’ve just stopped obsessing so much. I enjoy turning on Sir MixA-lot to shake it when Yankeebean and I meet up to celebrate some curves-action. I love that many women (and men too) in the UK,  as Yankeebean wrote last week , don’t really seem to give a rip about toned abs and bingo wings so openly and obsessively.  Let’s face it, some British women dress like hookers when Saturday night rolls around, no matteh’ what their shape. I really admire that, even if its not my style.

I think one of our readers, Sandra Dee, summed it perfectly:

‘Not that I am against staying in shape, its just the Hollywood-ness of it all made me realise how obsessed I used to be too. I used to delight in my flat-abbed stomach. Now. well, I can’t be bothered to care. In England it is so cold that I normally don’t get the time to show it off anyway. Well, except to my English man. And you should see his stomach….. he does NOT have a six pack nor does he want one or care about my newly formed fat bulge.

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What Others Are Saying

  1. katieseattle July 8, 2010 at 6:55 am

    Wow David, I can’t believe the ladies aren’t lining up and beating down your door. Cause ya know, nothing lights my fire quite like a chauvinistic American male with entitlement issues. Quick and easy sex? OMIGOD!!!! Please, sign me up straight away! I am just going to hazard a guess that you aren’t overly concerned with whether your partner is enjoying herself. Or, on that token, anything outside of your misguided little mind. I am sure you will someday make some poor girl quite miserable.

  2. David July 5, 2010 at 9:05 am

    Hey girls, I’m impressed you published my previous comment. I thought you might censor it. Kudos to you.

    @ YankeeBean

    To be honest I don’t know how much time they spend working on their personalities. I’ve spent over 6 months traveling in South America but because my spanish is not perfect, I cant say for sure about their personalities. The one think I can say is that they are pleasers. They really take joy and pride in making their man happy. And that I like.

    Sure, confidence and and upbeat attitude are great. I agree with that. But for me femininity is really important. American and English girls really lack femininity. Both in personality and looks. This is not meant to be an attack girls. Western culture just doesn’t value female qualities, and so women end up striving to be more like men. In South America, Asia, Eastern Europe and other places, women are truly free to be women, and that to me is very sexy.

    Ban me for talking about fat girls??? lol. Common my dear, the whole article is about fatties :) Besides, I would miss you all too much if you banned me ;)

    @ peacefulyorkshire

    I wouldn’t do well in the UK? How do you mean? Like with the ladies? hahahaha Please…
    I’ve traveled all over the world, and US and UK girls are the easiest. Common now, you know its true. Nobody drinks more than US and UK girls. And thanks to the feminist revolution they are “sexually liberated” . The US and UK are a playboys dream. Sex on the first night is standard. Its so much harder to get laid in other countries. Although I’ve never been to the UK, I’ve swooped several UK girls on my travels. The only thing looser than a UK girl is a UK girl on holiday :) (he he. Sorry that s little harsh, but true)

    Quote: “So really you have insulted women and their appearances from two different continents.”

    Thats the problem with US and UK girls. You’all got these feminist undertones that men are always “insulting women”. blah, blah, blah. Common now my dear, although you may not admit it, deep down you know you like a macho masculine man. Not these sissy men we got here in the US and you’ve got in the UK. Its amazing, in the US and UK men are encouraged to act more like women, women are encouraged to act more like men, and we end up with almost one gender. In the rest of the world men are real men, and women are real women. And they appreciate each others qualities.

    Don’t get me wrong. I love US and UK girls. They are really the best in the world for quick and easy sex, and thats a big plus in my book. But for a relationship, life is just so much easier with a sexy Brazilian that loves to please. Or a hot Ukrainian who never leaves the house without makeup and heels, and encourages her man’s masculine side. And dont even get me started on Japanese girls. Them girls get to bowing when their man walks in… literally.

    Ok, Im done, let the feminist outrage flow ladies ….. :)

  3. yankeebean June 30, 2010 at 6:07 pm

    @David – Do they spend time on their personalities, intelligence and sense of humour? So they have something left after their boobs droop to their knees and their 3rd face lift starts to sag?

    I don’t have a weight problem, but my husband tells me all the time that his favourite thing about me is my positive outlook on life. If he had been interested in me just because of how I look, I would’ve run a mile.

    Confidence is attractive, no matter what package it comes in.

    Oh, and don’t you dare come on here talking about ‘fat chicks’ again – or you’re banned, brother…

    • peacefulyorkshire June 30, 2010 at 7:54 pm

      dear David,
      In the future it is best you don’t come to the UK with such a narrow minded approach to women. Yes, best stay away, you would not do well here.
      I think that your use of South American mujeres as an example is just as much of a stereotype and is not a fair comment to them either. I have been to South America and seen women who do not fit this image, nor do they want to. So really you have insulted women and their appearances from two different continents. Ouch! You’re not fairing well, me thinks…
      Yours sincerely,
      Peaceful Yorkshire

  4. David June 30, 2010 at 2:31 am

    Reading this article gave me one more reason not to visit to England… Fat chicks.

    Girls, don’t let your “hubbies” go to South America. Brazilian, Colombian, and Venezuelan women spend a lot of time and energy on their bodies and appearance.

  5. Yorkshire Yank May 21, 2010 at 9:39 am

    I agree completely that being healthy is more important than anything else.

    Many of my Facebook friends are women that I knew in high school in the US.

    In their photos, a lot of them have incredibly gaunt faces and superskinny bodies.

    Even if the photos are photoshopped, that just means that these women want to look that way.

    None of these women were very skinny in high school, so they aren’t women who happen to have high metabolisms and eat and eat and still lose weight. They are purposely doing things to stay extremely thin.

    The funny thing is that I was always the superskinny girl in school, and I am very happy with the fact that since reaching middle age I’ve filled out a little.

  6. yankeebean May 19, 2010 at 4:53 pm

    I just wish (globally) that it was about being HEALTHY, not skinny…

    I’m not ‘skinny’ – you can’t see my ribs (at least not without an x-ray…), I’ve got bits that wobble when I walk, and I have slightly more than one chin in roughly 40 percent of all photos taken of me. :D

    But I’m smack dab in the middle of a health body weight for my height (based on my BMI), I exercise at least 3 times a week, and I eat really healthily because my guy a genius-healthy-chef-type.

    And, let’s face it, being really skinny isn’t healthy for a lot of folks – unless you’re born with super sonic metabolism. Power to the curvy healthy people!

  7. Yorkshire Yank May 19, 2010 at 9:16 am

    One of the first things I noticed when moving to the UK is that so many of the women here seem to erm, really like dessert.

    I think when people talk about fat Americans, they are thinking of the morbidly obese, need to buy 2 seats on the plan, the BBC made a special about me, fat people.

    When it comes to the slightly chubby, would be healther if she lost a few pounds, type of fat, there seem to be more of those in Britain.

    The gigantic Americans skew the figures.

    And there seem to be many more very skinny American women. When was the last time you saw a UK size 4 (equivalent to a US size 0) in a British shop?

  8. GingerGirl May 18, 2010 at 11:17 pm

    Me too! I was just bemoaning my ‘winter weight’ situation the other day and part of the problem was that my lovely British beau is so complementary about my body. I know that I am so lucky, but the teeeeeenist little corner of my mind wishes that maybe he wasn’t quite so generous with his compliments so I would be a little more motivated to hit the gym (you know, that one that I don’t belong to and have been intending to join since I moved, but what’s the use). Apparently,however, there doesn’t appear to be a swimsuit season here, so I am not going to spend another second worrying about that. I am going to use the Mistress Christina method and enjoy putting in the time to gain memories instead of losing weight. You know, the truly important things in life!

  9. Lisa May 18, 2010 at 3:07 pm

    Been living in London for about 9 months and actually have lost weight. I went home to California for Christmas and everyone remarked on how skinny I was. The British BF loves my body. He often remarks on my “amazing body” (the same body that in CA would be on the plumper side of average). So so good for the self conciousness I have.

    On a side note, I have been reading this site since I came over and it really has given me some insight to my British man. Thanks!

  10. Kim May 18, 2010 at 1:19 pm

    I knew it was true love the day my (English) beau said to his mate “I couldn’t stand being with a girl who only ate salad”. (And so, you know, for his sake I eat chips and pies instead, right?)

  11. Rebecca May 17, 2010 at 5:19 pm

    Yes! I moved from Florida and I never realized how obsessed people (including me) were about working out. Everyone is so caught up in trying to look perfect – it now seems so shallow and superficial.
    I remember all my friends teasing me about how much weight I was going to lose when I moved to England because the food was so awful – obviously they had never been to the UK ’cause I packed on the poundage! Thank goodness my Brit hubby tells me he doesn’t like the “stick insect” look! LOL

  12. Mistress Christina May 17, 2010 at 12:01 pm

    yankeebean – I would rather watch football with the Boy and drink pints of beer than put in the work to obtain those washboard abs. And considering I have fun memories instead of boring hours in the gym I think I’ll stick with a rounded tum instead.

    • peacefulyorkshire May 17, 2010 at 1:33 pm

      Right on, Mistress Christina! I couldn’t agree with you more about the fun memories you are creating. (Sounds like from your first comment you are creating them in all kinds of ways !) hehe

  13. alisha May 17, 2010 at 1:37 am

    Yes! Many DIY chair exercises from Self magazine in my pre-England days! Now I think it’s funny that the 20-year-old LA version of myself thought working out 5 days a week was normal. Ha ha…

  14. Mistress Christina May 16, 2010 at 8:00 pm

    It’s uncanny that the day after I finally got naked with my English boy you guys put this post up. I love it! Also being of the non-twig-like-variety I’ve found that the guys over here are less than concerned with a few added curves. Although I haven’t put on any weight here, pretty much every other American-lass friend of mine has… chips are not a vegetable, despite that they are served as such! And my god they are soooo good. That and beer. It really is surprising I’ve remained the same size…

    • yankeebean May 16, 2010 at 11:35 pm

      Mistress Christina – I’m in the ‘shrinking’ category, too. I think it’s all the walking probably… But even though I had a big shrink-down after I moved here, there’s not a washboard stomach in sight :D

  15. roya May 16, 2010 at 3:44 pm

    I totally went through the same thing! 6 years ago I moved to Ireland, thinking “I’m moving to Europe. That means I’m going to get skinny!” Thousands of cups of tea later, with these new pieces of evil called “biscuits” and I gained an easy stone within the year! I’m living in England now, and FINALLY am back to my US weight. What gives? :) Nah, I’m so glad I’ve got to experience all the perfection that goes into lovely meat pies, pasties, and scones with extra cream and jam on top. mmmm.

  16. starle May 15, 2010 at 11:07 pm

    Oh i *so* hear you there. I have gone from a size 0-3 to …oh wait that wont work! i shudder to even think (!) what my US size would be…..i have gone from a 10 to a 16 here! GAH! Britain should make Americans THINNER!!!
    wah! ;)
    I do agree that i care here so much less than i used to. but my boo-tifule bloke is totally fit! .
    > ;(
    grrrr

  17. peacefulyorkshire May 15, 2010 at 2:02 pm

    Hi Forensic Spice,
    So glad you are lovin’ em!
    (says me joyfully dancing around my office shaking my ‘healthy butt’ …)
    :)

  18. Forensic Spice May 15, 2010 at 1:16 pm

    Did I mention that I LOVE your posts? You crack me up with that Vicky Se’s comment!

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