De-mystifying the ‘British girl’s night out’, or ‘Why do some British women dress like hookers when Saturday night rolls around?’

Posted on November 23, 2009 by peacefulyorkshire

peacefulyorkshire

peacefulyorkshire

Ok, so the blog title is a little unfair. When Saturday night comes rollin’ in some British women don’t always look like hookers.  No, sorry, my mistake—sometimes they could be classified as looking like strippers. I am still trying to decide which of the two is a better description for my Yorkshire city on a Saturday night. Stripper or hooker…wait, maybe stripper. Maybe a hooker slash stripper. Maybe a hooker with a dash and swoosh of stripper.  Maybe a hooker stroke wannabe stripper. Whateveh you want to call it, honey–after 5 years of living on this little island in the North Sea, I am still trying to figure out why some British women let themselves pour out of their clothes on a night out. Yes, pour out is the perfect sentiment.

I decided to ask Cat, an English female friend  ‘So, why do British women dress like hookers on Saturday night?’

Her response? Because they are desperate and on the pull. And they think it looks good. ‘

(Cat, a devoted Marks and Spencer clothing lovah  is not one of these Saturday night ladies, mind you.)

I asked Carlo,  a British football coach the same question ‘So, why do British women dress like hookers on Saturday night?’

His answer—–‘They do!?’ (I had some serious laughing at this point)

As an American living in Yorkshire, I think that I have started to figure out the ladies night out in Britain. It’s simple, my lovelies!!

  • Just wear as little as possible in material as tight as possible.  Got it, little and tight are your motto.
  • If you have lots of flesh, don’t fret. Make sure it hangs out in abundance. Bonus if you can show your cellulite and cleavage.
  • NEVER wear a coat, we want everyone to see your gorgeous Primark outfit– which shows off your white (or orange depending on your style!)  legs.
  • yes, let’s talk about legs. If your legs are ‘larger’ than most you will need to expose them as high up as you can show them…. like up to where your bum starts is fine, no worries!
  • By now you should know that if you are really serious about your weekend then flats are a no-no. If you wiggle and wobble and can not walk properly in your eight inchers then these are the ones to wear!
  • Oh and before I forget. Probably best to wear all the make-up you own at once.

And here you are complaining to your British man you have nothing to wear to your next Christmas office party?? Just look in your lingerie drawer!

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  1. Guest June 22, 2011 at 4:39 pm

    I’m a half-half, meaning half is American, although I’ve hardly lived in the US. While in the US though, in New England, I experienced the same thing about American women going out: make it tight and make it light, even in the middle of winter with snow outside and below freezing temperatures, the rule is show what you can and wear no coat. So, it’s not only the Brits doing this I guess… 

  2. Nithya December 3, 2010 at 12:10 am

    Awww having grown up clubbing since I was a wee 16 year old in Sheffield this makes me a curious mix of nostalgic/ashamed/defensive.

    You have to remember that regardless of how judgy people around you are when you’re dressed like a stripper, you’ve already had hours of giggling with your girlfriends as you get ready together and sharing clothes and doing each others’ hair and makeup (which is why you end up looking sort of clone-like). You’ve got all your favourite people with you and there’s lights and music and you take photos and you really feel young and fizzy and on top of the world. Although a lot of that is alcohol anyway. I wasn’t any beauty queen but I’m glad I still have those memories of feeling….just ace. FULL of confidence. Yes a lot of girls pull but if you look the majority have dressed up for their gaggle and will dance together like loons all night. I’m glad I didn’t give it up as I worried if my top was too tight over my tummy or whatever.

    Also England’s got a completely different reaction to binge drinking than America…if you’re on a night out nearly everything’s excusible. I remember seeing our maths tutor hammered and hitting on some woman on a night out and we only had the same level of “oh yeah teachers continue to function after school” moment we got when we bumped into a dance teacher at Tesco. The person you are when you hit the town is allowed to be completely seperate from the more restrained girl you are in the daytime.

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  4. peacefulyorkshire May 14, 2010 at 2:11 pm

    Mander, your story had me chuckling. Especially about those women the crawling on the ice to safety. Surely one would have figured out that stilettos on ice= bad idea?
    Ridiculous, eh?

    • yankeebean May 14, 2010 at 3:40 pm

      I was chuckling too… I won’t wear heels if I have to walk farther than 50 feet. But in ice?? Flipping FORGET IT.

  5. Mander May 14, 2010 at 9:38 am

    I just found your blog, linked from UK Yankee.

    Just wanted to add an experience from last winter. After we had at least a week of snow every day, I went out in on the Friday before Xmas, and there were tons of people out despite the weather, and the fact that everything was covered in ice. My friend and I had to wait for a taxi for over an hour, and we were both freezing despite having on all the requisite winter gear. It was amazing to see what the other people were wearing. So many women were teetering around in the ice in high heels and skimpy dresses, and quite a few of them fell and some even had to crawl on their hands and knees to a place where there wasn’t any ice, because they couldn’t stand up due to the ice. The girl standing in line in front of us was wearing a sleeveless leotard, with bare legs and arms, knee-high socks, stillettos, and a goofy elf hat. Amazing.

    I grew up in Colorado, which is supposed to be a “cold” state, and we are nowhere near this hardcore. I mean, some people wear shorts all year, but every bar has a cheap coat check in the winter. Maybe I should start up some kind of portable coat check business next year…

  6. Parakeet May 4, 2010 at 12:32 pm

    SO SO true!!! Especially the part about wearing-no-coat-even-if-it-is-less-than-4′C-in-early-February… I will never ever understand that one!

  7. Yorkshire yank December 19, 2009 at 4:16 pm

    I have to admit that when I was in my teens and early 20s I may worn some clothing that was a little bit tight or a little bit revealing.

    What I was not prepared for, when I moved to the UK, was seeing women in their 40s and 50s – who look like they are in their 40s and 50s- going out with thick layers of black eyeliner and mascara and wearing tight tops with no bra and saggy cleavage spilling out.

    Well, I suppose it’s nice that these women still feel confident about their bodies .

  8. Steve Shawcross December 14, 2009 at 9:53 pm

    @Justine: I think it’s more a reputation than reality! Your modern day Geordie lass in the Bigg Market on a Saturday night is a far cry from the likes of Jane Austen ;)

  9. Justine December 8, 2009 at 8:38 pm

    OH MY yeah. It’s SO TRUE! My fiance is English and last month we were in London and one night on the way back to the hotel it was a weekend night and I couldn’t believe what the girls were wearing! Seriously, straight up hookers!

    I wonder why if the reputation of an English lady is that she is very quiet and isn’t very sociable how this psyche could allow her to dress in such a manner?

  10. Kicha December 8, 2009 at 6:14 pm

    Something I noticed in the Surrey area is alot of women seem to be in love with leggings. No matter their size or age. For awhile I thought I stepped back into the 1980′s. One thing to wear leggings but another thing not to wear a top that at least covers their tush.

    • peacefulyorkshire December 8, 2009 at 7:20 pm

      Kicha, tell me about it, I know!! Inside though I am secretly jealous of those girls that CAN get away with wearing a short top with leggings… haha

  11. Cinda December 4, 2009 at 9:56 pm

    Must be why my english beau always refers to the women in the pubs as pole dancers….think I get it now.

  12. Jenny December 3, 2009 at 12:49 pm

    I’m in the Midlands, and this is an accurate reflection of what they look like here as well. We don’t often go into town on a weekend night because of the crowds, but my husband says that one night we will, just to see the sights (crazy people) out and about in Leicester. I feel silly sometimes worrying over what to wear when we go out, as I didn’t bring very many clothes with me when I moved and haven’t bought any since I got here… don’t know why I bother at all, with the current “fashions.”

  13. Christopher Graves November 29, 2009 at 6:00 pm

    It seems here in the Manchester area the girl’s start getting ready on Wednesday for Saturday night. Also I’m amazed at the great “self body image” that alot of the bigger girls seem to have in the way they dress when Saturday does come around.

  14. alisha November 28, 2009 at 7:54 pm

    This is so true. I remember the first time I went out on a Saturday night here and was like – wow, British ladies got some confidence! What amazes me even more are the coordinated, inter-generational hen do brigades that roam around Leicester Square. The bespoke t-shirts make it easy to identify who is the bride, mum and grandma and all are livin’ it up.

  15. Steve Shawcross November 28, 2009 at 7:26 pm

    It’s certainly true in places such as Newcastle, where young ladies are scantily clad– despite it being only a few degrees above freezing. I suppose the booze keeps them warm, the “barcardigan”.

    I think the trend for not wearing a coat, negates the need to find a cloakroom and also the risk of one’s coat getting nicked.

    I don’t see the problem with women dressing like this, it’s nowt to me; their choice, they want to do it I’m sure! It could be you have some decorum though ;)

  16. erica November 26, 2009 at 8:09 am

    Well, I’m not sure this is limited to just Yorkshire. I’m from Boston, in college in Boston, and I’m just aghast at how my classmates and roommates dress when they’re going out on the weekends. Last winter was really, really cold here, and a couple of girls ended up with frost-bitten toes because they refused to cover them at all! It may be more of a generational-thing, you know? Anyway, the young men certainly don’t seem to mind current trends.

    • peacefulyorkshire November 26, 2009 at 9:22 pm

      Hi Erica,
      Hmm… have you been in Britain on a night out, my lovely reader? I don’t think it is a generational gap as you suggest. I think that the difference is that in Britain (and not only in Yorkshire, this is an island-wide trend!) ALL ages of women enjoy wearing hooker getups….. not just the university students as you mention!! Oh yes, frostbite is erm, a very sexy look…. this goes with the mottled legs and purple veins that Expatmum suggests :)

  17. lovesahoosier November 25, 2009 at 9:55 pm

    so so right , i love this blog , made me laugh out loud.

  18. Expat Mum November 25, 2009 at 7:50 pm

    I agree that the further north you get the less they wear. In my day the hippie trend was to wear huge, second hand fur coats so we lucked out.
    By the way, the other essential for this look is to have purple veins and mottle marks on your thighs.

  19. Brooke November 25, 2009 at 1:43 pm

    As an American living in Yorkshire myself, I noticed this as soon as I moved over three years ago. My Irish husband and I were just talking about this yesterday after we passed three girls who were on their way out. The girls were all wearing essentially the same skimpy looking outfit (same style/color and same shoes, another young Brit-girl phenomenon I have yet to understand) when it was freezing outside. There we stood in our stocking hats and down jackets watching as they shivered, shook and drunkenly passed us walking like Bambi on ice in their matching purple stilettos. This blog is so funny and so true.

  20. Michelloui November 25, 2009 at 12:10 pm

    Its crazy, isnt it? but reassuring too. It means you can wear any kind of outfit and be ok because there’s always someone who’ll look worse than you. Guaranteed. ;)

  21. Dyana November 25, 2009 at 10:43 am

    nope, it’s ‘normal’ women too. it’s just the standard style when going out, whether on the pull or out w mates, at least from my friends. but hey, i nearly always am out in jeans, t-shirts and trainers and the places i go don’t have dresscodes, so what do i know! :D

  22. a November 25, 2009 at 9:51 am

    I thought just the chav girls dressed like that? Or do women who look normal during day time hours morph into their superhero stripper/hooker image by night?

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  25. Rachel November 24, 2009 at 7:51 pm

    I describe the get-up to my bloke as “a handkerchief secured with dental floss.” The part about the heels is hilariously accurate!

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  27. MissChicago November 24, 2009 at 5:52 pm

    HILARIOUS…. and so true!

  28. Mud November 24, 2009 at 2:44 am

    There is some weird formulae that means that the further north you go (and therefore the colder it gets) the less women wear on a night out! It can be terrifying. And that’s speaking as a Brit.

    As a general rule, if 3 female generations of a family are out on the town, and wearing the same, ‘minimalist’ outfit. It’s time to go home!

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