Your negativity is eating my brain… stop it, I NEED my brain
Posted on May 28, 2009 by yankeebean
Recently we had another cracking comment from one of my fave readers, ‘I Love This Blog’ (don’t worry ILTB, you’re not the one eating my brain, more on that later). On our post ‘My English man and our long distance relationship‘ She said:
I was just wondering how your loved ones reacted to your moving overseas for love? Not that it’s really affecting my decisions, but most, nay-ALL, of my closest friends are 100% against the idea and think I will either have my heart broken or be sorely disappointed.. The only ones who support my decision are the ones who are completely right-brained, completely romantic, and have no grasp of common sense or logic (so, it’s a little disheartening..)
How did you do it? Did you find a job first, or did you just up and move? I’m a little nervous!
So many memories (good/bad/ugly) flooded in when I read this comment. When it came to hopping-the-pond for love, my heart and my head were pretty much always in agreement. It was my FRIENDS of all freakin’ things that made me wanna panic, unpack, and apply to work in the nearest global food chain.
There was no shortage of negativity – it came pelting in from all angles. Even my best friend showed her disapproval just by keeping her mouth shut about it (y’know, ‘if you don’t have anything nice to say’, yada yada yada). Sometimes I felt like their negative monologues were actually burrowing into my brain… gross… too much information.
Negativity isn’t exactly what you NEED when you’re about to cram all of your belongings into two giant suitcases, say good-bye to your parents, hurtle through the air in a giant metal tube (I hate flying…), and stumble, bleary and unkempt, into the wonderful arms of ‘the reason for all this’.
I really de-railed a couple of times pre-move when my friends would launch in to a ‘This is never going to work and when it all comes crashing down you’ll be alone and penniless in a foreign country’ speeches. SHUT UP, for God’s sake!! I need SUPPORT right now!! I’m about to move to a country that doesn’t even have a written form of their constitution!! Can you freakin’ BACK ME UP for a minute here?? (That’s the sound of me derailing… sorry about the constitution snipe)
At the end of the day (to use a most-excellent English expression), none of it ultimately stopped me from boarding the giant metal tube… I mean plane. I tried to apply an ‘I’m rubber and you’re glue’ attitude to the whole friend-negativity-eat-my-brain mutiny. Did it work? I have no idea, but here I am! And it’s good… it’s REALLY good…
Oh yeah, about the job hunting – I did look before I arrived, but I didn’t actually land a job until I’d turned up. I’m sure you’ll find just the thing! And if you need a shoulder for leaning or an ear for bending, we’re here!