A chavtastic-fantastic-Yorkshire affair

Posted on November 17, 2008 by peacefulyorkshire

yahooavatar15You frequently hear about their tracksuits, ASBOS, council estate flats, knife problems, and “what a bad thing they are to society”. Chavs have such a poor reputation in Britain!

Well, yes, I knew he had some “chav” qualities, when he first sat his cheeky handsome-self on the Manchester-Leeds train.

But I didn’t care.

His name was Dono and he had the YOOOHHkshaw drawl.

After we first slept together he said with concern “ My Dahhhling American princess, what time to do you want me to set the Alaaam for the Mooohhhning? Oh, how my heart melted!  It was that Yorkshire charm, yes, you know the one!

He wore his white Fred Perry shirt proudly and his mom gladly ironed his Ted Baker jeans for our dates.

Oh, no Leeds University education for him, he was a self made man– didn’t need any of that “classy stuff”. Seacroft Council estate was his conquered kingdom of his business world.

His iridescent purple Peugeot 306 purple was so bling bling, that when he drove he was death on wheels–with Galaxy FM blaring from his sub woofers.

Maybe some BBC Radio 1, perhaps, I would ask? Too posh, he would say.

My stuffy orchestral colleagues would attempt to warn me. Oh darling, we were so worried about you last night after that.. that… that… um …guy .. he drove away so recklessly… did you make it home okay?

(Dono never went to any of my classical harp gigs, not his scene, he would say).

Dono never ate vegetables except the fried variety, and he gave me gifts he ordered especially for me off the QVC.

I introduced him to Yorkshire vegan restaurants and earl grey tea. He loved both.

Dono and I lasted two weeks. He was my one-and-only-chavtastic-fantastic-experience.

Now, who says that chavs have to be so bad for England? I had a great time—!

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What Others Are Saying

  1. Billy Bungee March 13, 2009 at 3:19 pm

    Hmmmm. I’m not convinced he was a proper chav.

    He seems to have been able to form a sentence.

  2. pacificyorkshirebird November 17, 2008 at 7:56 pm

    He WAS one lucky chav. I made some assumptions about a couple of chav looking guys a few months ago. Turned out to be totally friendly and well spoken. I felt bad for being surprised!

  3. yankeebean November 17, 2008 at 1:59 pm

    This is a classic tale! And he was one lucky chav… ;)

    I often meet people with classic chav fashion that are really friendly. Having said that, I also still joke about chavs and ASBOS and stuff like that. Maybe I should stop!

  4. peacefulyorkshire March 13, 2009 at 4:16 pm

    Well, I see your point that chavs that are actually earning (legitimate) money and can form proper sentences could be debatable as to their true “chav status”. But there were definably “the signs”. His favorite sentence to ask me was if if I could pick him up a couple of pairs of Tommy H. jeans while in America. He really wanted some!!
    The next most chav-tastic sentence he formed? Well, it just wouldn’t be lady like to repeat it on this blog…;)

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